Can You Have My Back While I Take This Big Career Leap?
How to ask for support during big transitions…without guilt or pressure.
Big changes don’t just test your courage; they test your relationships. When you’re stepping into something new, maybe it’s a promotion, a pivot, a creative risk, it’s natural to feel both excitement and fear. But for many high-achievers, asking for help feels harder than the leap itself.
What you don’t need? Rescuing. What you absolutely need? Resonance. Someone who can hold steady while you take the next step.
Here’s how to ask for that support with clarity and grace using the FRAME Method.
F – Find Your Calm
You don’t have to go through this transition alone. Take a few breaths before the conversation and remind yourself: asking for support isn’t weakness, it’s wisdom.
R – Reflect on the Facts
“This career move is a big deal for me, and I know it’s going to come with some challenges.”
Ground the conversation in reality, not worry. You’re letting them in on what’s changing, not asking them to fix it.
A – Acknowledge Your Feelings
“I want to make sure we’re on the same page about how this might affect us, both emotionally and financially.” Honesty builds safety. It shows you’re thinking about us, not just me.
M – Make a Clear Request
“Your support means a lot, whether that’s encouragement, patience, or just understanding that things might be hectic for a while.” Be specific about what support actually looks like to you. Don’t make them guess.
E – Engage Without Expectation
“I want to check in with you, too. How do you feel about this change?”
Support is a two-way street. Inviting their feelings in creates collaboration, not imbalance.
Full Script
“Hey [Partner], this career move is a big deal for me, and I know it’s going to come with some challenges. I want to make sure we’re on the same page about how this might affect us, both emotionally and financially. Your support means a lot- whether that’s encouragement, patience, or just understanding that things might be hectic for a while. I want to check in with you, too. How do you feel about this change?”
Advice
Support isn’t just about words; it’s about feeling emotionally safe as you navigate change. Invite your partner into your process not as a problem-solver, but as a grounding presence. Let them know exactly what kind of support helps you feel safe, whether that’s reassurance, space, or partnership through uncertainty.
Reflection Prompt
What kind of support do I need most in this transition?
How can I ask for it clearly, without fear that it’s “too much”?
xx,
Adrienne
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